I am the wind’s whisper of the night
I am the morning-song and her echo
You live off my bounty
I gave birth to your parents
And today, I am dying for you
It astonishes me –
this embrace with poison
The death dance she and I are in
I will die saving you
But you can’t live without me
Will you hear my silent cries
And remember me in time
Or will we destroy ourselves
And leave our decayed remains
To birth a new Mother
And will she create a new race
Or are we the last attempt
My heart skipped four beats
Within seconds I realized my error
The tantrum I just threw
Would be my last
I always knew that my quick, reckless anger
Would be the death of me
Within seconds
I saw how foolish I had been
Within seconds
I knew
It was too late
The darkness descended
The blight that you brought to my lands
Soul-grooves
Worn into my heart
Rivulets of salt-tears
Eroded the once-pristine landscape inside
But I’ve started a conservancy
To build my self up again
Renew, rebuild, regrowth
One day, no traces of you will remain on my terrain
And the wind will carry the seeds of my heartlands
To populate fertile fields so that love will spread
And color the world a thousand shades of beautiful
Of notable worth:
My eyes
My smile
My heart
My soul
These remain
These are intact
These are mine
I’m an angry cur
I sit and lick my wounds
No longer on a chain
I stay put and don’t run off
Tremble at the feet of my abuser
Long since a ghost: no more a man
Yet his switch is alive in my body-mind
Can I rescue my self
Get myself to a shelter
Learn how to trust and to love
Retrain the cower out of my body and soul
Lose the haunted look in my eyes
Allow me to assure you
You are intricately woven into my psyche
I’ve taken elaborate measures to leave you behind
To erase the traces of your affect on my personality –
On my life – to little or no avail
It seems that I carry you, etched into my soulskin
You are colored into the lines of a million needle sticks
Just as a pickle can never become a cucumber again
I am forever altered, forever changed
And yet, that is not the end of the story
I have decided to turn the design you’ve created
Into a whole new pattern of my own creation
Just try to recognize yourself in it
Allow me to reassure you
You won’t
Allow me to return
All that you bestowed upon me
Including, but not limited to
A cautious nature
Fear of people
Embarrassment at being seen in my enthusiasm
The tendency to be cynical
Body self-consciousness
Shame
Self-doubt
Feel free to do what you will with these
I no longer wish to live from them
They were never mine to begin with
“I have a vague recollection of having met you somewhere before, too,” she replied with a detached coolness that belied her racing heart and clammy palms to the unexpected but welcome interruption to her shopping by one of the most attractive men she’d ever met.
“Don’t make me take a mallet to you,” she said wickedly as she began to prepare the chicken breast she’d bought for her dinner.
It was little exchanges like this that made her apartment feel a little less lonely at night.
With a giggle followed by an almost imperceptible sigh, she rinsed the breast in water and patted it dry with a paper towel, and returned to the task at hand.
Who is the authentic me
The me I feel I am inside
Or the me that everyone sees in me
Beyond the Skinny Branches 