Uncategorized

The Clearing

Aside ~ ~ Beyond the Skinny Branches ~ 2 Comments

I feel the sunlight through my closed eyelids

Warm, solid, like a nudge from the sun

“Go on, girl,” she says

“Don’t look back anymore”

And I know she’s right

The time has come to truly begin this journey

I’m finally out of the dense woods that’ve been my home for so long

I made a beautiful space for myself there

But it was never meant to be my permanent home

And so I open my eyes

Look around at the roads that lay ahead

That lead from this clearing I now find myself standing in

I take a deep breath, and I take my first step

Into my life

Inspired by The Daily Post Word Prompt: journey

Clown School Daze

Aside ~ ~ Beyond the Skinny Branches ~ 13 Comments

Today marks the completion of my five week clown and commedia extravaganza.

I am not the same person that I was five weeks ago. I am different in ways I don’t even comprehend yet.

I am exhausted in the best of ways having truly spent myself each day.

In clown, if you let yourself, you open up like a little flower.

I fell in love over and over again with my fellow clowns. My heart broke open daily and then expanded several sizes and is bursting from my chest.

The world is shinier. I hear music everywhere. I make up little songs.

I carry the moments of courage, of tragedy, of brilliance, of mess, of genius, of laughter, of wonder, and of the amazing live theatre we made together these weeks with me forever.

I found out some very important things along the way.

I am too tired to try to articulate them today. I know they will be revealed in my future work.

I am sated, for the moment, and I celebrate these weeks.

My appetite will return.

But for today, I am sated.

And grateful.

Travel Tips

Aside ~ ~ Beyond the Skinny Branches ~ 1 Comment

So I’m a tourist in my own life, am I?

OK, so let’s go with that.

A) It’s better than no trip at all.

And 2) Mind your own beeswax.

Inspired by The Daily Post Daily Word Prompt: tourist

Inside-Out

Aside ~ ~ Beyond the Skinny Branches ~ 6 Comments

It is easy to live life unconsciously hurting yourself in ways that seem subtle, but add up.

These are the small and large ways I deprive myself daily:

I do not drink enough water

I wait until my towels and sheets are seriously past their prime before getting new ones

I hurl myself through experiences sometimes with little attention to the scared parts of me that are there being hurled too

I push myself to seem happier than I feel so as not to bum others out

I push away my anger, hearing my father’s voice: “No one loves an angry girl.”

I skip over little hurts (but they still hurt,) sending the message that they don’t count (but they do)

I don’t take the time to cheer myself for all that I am doing right

I hold off going to pee until it is the last minute

How are you depriving yourself in little and large ways?

Acknowledge that, turn each thing around on itself by identifying the opposite action, and voila! You have a beautiful self-care list!

Inspired by The Daily Post Daily Prompt: deprive

Personal Prophet

Aside ~ ~ Beyond the Skinny Branches ~ 1 Comment

I don’t believe in prophecy

That the Divine chooses certain people over others

I believe we are all divine

And carry within us a higher self who knows the way

I don’t worship kings or popes or leaders who rule through fear

I believe together we will find our way through

To the Light

Inspired by The Daily Post Word Prompt: prophecy

Constant Companion

Aside ~ ~ Beyond the Skinny Branches ~ 1 Comment

A hunger, an appetite

For more of what, I do not know

Resides inside me all the time

Tells me how to feel, where to go

Will fight hard to get what’s mine

Begrudges others getting theirs

I try to feed it, it just wants more

It doesn’t trust that I am there

And so I love her anyway, since, after all, she’s mine

I try to guide her, try to soothe her

I accept her enormous need

I take her hand and sing her songs

And hope that one day, she’ll be freed

Inspired by The Daily Post Word Prompt: companion

Hello, Old Friend

Aside ~ ~ Beyond the Skinny Branches ~ 2 Comments

The clown nose.

The world’s smallest mask.

When donned, it can bring magic to the courageous soul underneath.

If you give yourself to it.

Let it lead the way.

Soften your brain. Let your eyes open big, your eyebrows go up.

Let your tongue be heavy in your mouth.

Begin to look for sparkly things as you inhale and reach to find your wonder, just above your head.

Oh, there you are.

There you are.

Hello, old friend.

 

The Battle

Aside ~ ~ Beyond the Skinny Branches ~ 2 Comments

Sometimes I struggle with life

With living it, that is

I love it, this life

But it’s hard sometimes

And when I am in the struggle

When I feel like life is against me

I forget I’m not alone in it

Everyone’s lives look so easy compared to mine

And I feel so weary

But eventually, the struggle passes

And I return to myself again

Everything is not rainbows and moonbeams

But I can feel the presence of others again

And I no longer feel so…

On my own against the world

And that makes all the difference

Inspired by The Daily Post Archived Daily Word Prompt: struggle